The Dole
Yesterday I signed on for the first time.
I texted Sabs, said that if I'd never known her or Linz, I'd be close to hanging myself. Not strictly true but the sentiment is right, they taught me something. Sabs in particular said something that just struck me and changed my view on life.
It went along the lines of if you have enough, why do you need more?
They get pittance off their jobseekers, but they are happy, or at least happy now, after going through years of depression. Sabs even has a part time job in Shelter.
The jobs I've been applying for are between 12 and 20 grand a year. But what would I do with 20 grand a year. I have no one to support, once I get money, 20 grand, I reckon I could become self sufficient in five years or so on that. Beyond that money would go into spending and saving. I don't want a house or a car, I've become suited to living out of the one (large) room.
Until Sabs said what she said, I always assumed I'd move up the jobs ladder, but what if I was happy at the bottom of it? If that money could pay for everything I needed. Bigger and better jobs bring bigger and better stress.
And that was when I realised that Sabs was happy where she was. All that time I'd tried to talk her round to a job, she was happy with what she had. And I realised I'd become a slave to capitalism after all. Before, the Dole had seemed like the bottom rung, now, all rungs are equal.
But I can't seem to get a job. All I need is an initial outlay of five grand or less on a job I enjoy doing and I can become independent. But living with parents who fail to see, creates a pressure, small though it is at the moment. And I cannot get to where I wish to be even though it is virtually in my grasp. To be so close and yet so far is mortifying and everyone suffers in its wake.
Because of my parents I cannot even do what I must to stay alive. I am reduced to holding on to apron strings because of my emotional block. But they are off to Cornwall tomorrow and I am free! For two weeks at least, enough time to get done all the things I can't do when they are around me.
I've been watching The X Files. Dad has the whole set on DVD and I've been waiting for what seems like forever to watch them. Finally got to the last season today. Co-incided with a newspaper article saying that UFO sightings are down 80%, 100% in some parts of the country. It's a pity, sometimes I wish that the governments of the world were actually running an incredibly huge conspiracy behind all our backs. At least it would show that they were capable of doing something. Give us all a reason to get up in the mornings.
Why do all the good politicians die young (Robin Cook, Donald Dewar) while Ian Paisley goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and.........
Yibble:
A perfect description of my precise feelings at this particular moment in time.
I texted Sabs, said that if I'd never known her or Linz, I'd be close to hanging myself. Not strictly true but the sentiment is right, they taught me something. Sabs in particular said something that just struck me and changed my view on life.
It went along the lines of if you have enough, why do you need more?
They get pittance off their jobseekers, but they are happy, or at least happy now, after going through years of depression. Sabs even has a part time job in Shelter.
The jobs I've been applying for are between 12 and 20 grand a year. But what would I do with 20 grand a year. I have no one to support, once I get money, 20 grand, I reckon I could become self sufficient in five years or so on that. Beyond that money would go into spending and saving. I don't want a house or a car, I've become suited to living out of the one (large) room.
Until Sabs said what she said, I always assumed I'd move up the jobs ladder, but what if I was happy at the bottom of it? If that money could pay for everything I needed. Bigger and better jobs bring bigger and better stress.
And that was when I realised that Sabs was happy where she was. All that time I'd tried to talk her round to a job, she was happy with what she had. And I realised I'd become a slave to capitalism after all. Before, the Dole had seemed like the bottom rung, now, all rungs are equal.
But I can't seem to get a job. All I need is an initial outlay of five grand or less on a job I enjoy doing and I can become independent. But living with parents who fail to see, creates a pressure, small though it is at the moment. And I cannot get to where I wish to be even though it is virtually in my grasp. To be so close and yet so far is mortifying and everyone suffers in its wake.
Because of my parents I cannot even do what I must to stay alive. I am reduced to holding on to apron strings because of my emotional block. But they are off to Cornwall tomorrow and I am free! For two weeks at least, enough time to get done all the things I can't do when they are around me.
I've been watching The X Files. Dad has the whole set on DVD and I've been waiting for what seems like forever to watch them. Finally got to the last season today. Co-incided with a newspaper article saying that UFO sightings are down 80%, 100% in some parts of the country. It's a pity, sometimes I wish that the governments of the world were actually running an incredibly huge conspiracy behind all our backs. At least it would show that they were capable of doing something. Give us all a reason to get up in the mornings.
Why do all the good politicians die young (Robin Cook, Donald Dewar) while Ian Paisley goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and.........
Yibble:
A perfect description of my precise feelings at this particular moment in time.
posted by Caractacus at 00:01
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